Southern FL, GA, AL, LA, MS, TN, SC, NC,......AR

Anger Management

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 09:55 AM
  #1  
BlackGMC's Avatar
Thread Starter
Resident Retard
iTrader: (31)
 
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 17,216
Likes: 20
From: Fort Worth - TX
Default Anger Management

This is long but worth it. I got this in an email, thought someone might need a good laugh.

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone,
don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know.

It all started one day when I was sitting at my desk and remembered a phone call I had forgotten to make.
I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying,

"Hello."

I politely said, "This is Chris. May I please speak with Robin Carter? "

Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.
I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had transposed the last two digits of her phone number.
After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.
When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an *******!" and hung up.

I wrote his number down with the word '*******' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer.

Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an *******!"
It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic '*******' calling would have to stop.
So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from the Telephone Company.
I'm just calling to see if you're interested in the Caller ID program?"
He yelled, "NO!" and slammed the phone down.

I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an *******!"

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.

Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for.
I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for the spot. The idiot ignored me.
I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window, so I wrote down his number.

A couple of days later, right after calling the first *******, ( I had his number on speed dial ),
I thought I had better call the BMW *******, too.

I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"

"Yes, it is."
"Can you tell me where I can see it?"
"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and the car's parked right out in front."

"What's your name?" I asked.
"My name is Don Hansen," he said.
"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
"I'm home every evening after five."
"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
"Yes?"
"Don, you're an *******."

Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two ******** to call.

But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be.
So, I came up with an idea. I called ******* #1.

"Hello."
"You're an *******!" (But I didn't hang up.)
"Are you still there?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said.
"Stop calling me," he screamed.
"Make me," I said.
"Who are you?" he asked.
"My name is Don Hansen."
"Yeah? Where do you live?"
"*******, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with my black Beamer parked in front."
He said, "I' m coming over right now, Don.
And you had better start saying your prayers."
I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, *******."

Then I called ******* #2.
"Hello?" he said.
"Hello, *******," I said.
He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are!"
"You'll what?" I said.
"I'll kick your ***," he exclaimed.
I answered, "Well, *******, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now."

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at
1802 West 34th Street, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover.

Then I called Channel 3 News about the gang war going down on West 34th Street.
I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th street.

There I saw two ******** beating the crap out of each other in front of six
squad cars, a police helicopter, and a news crew. NOW, I feel better.

Anger management really works!
Reply
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 10:34 AM
  #2  
Tan327's Avatar
TECH Fanatic
iTrader: (15)
 
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 1,754
Likes: 0
From: Arkansas/Germany
Default

Haha that's great! I'd never have another bad day knowing I caused all of that.
Reply
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 12:14 PM
  #3  
slowec's Avatar
TECH Junkie
iTrader: (9)
 
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,062
Likes: 0
From: Brunswick, Ga
Default

LMFAO Thanks for posting that!
Reply
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 03:46 PM
  #4  
Derek @ EDO's Avatar
FormerVendor
iTrader: (73)
 
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,072
Likes: 8
From: Baton Rouge, LA
Default

you're an *******
Reply
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 04:22 PM
  #5  
07 z71 silverado's Avatar
11 Second Club
 
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,068
Likes: 0
From: cleveland,mississppi
Default

thats awesome
Reply
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 04:39 PM
  #6  
bud8fan's Avatar
TECH Addict
iTrader: (9)
 
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,453
Likes: 0
From: calallen,tx
Default

good one for shure!!!!
Reply
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 04:40 PM
  #7  
quicksilverado's Avatar
TECH Junkie
iTrader: (8)
 
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 3,944
Likes: 1
From: Marietta, Ga.
Default

That was great.
Reply
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 04:56 PM
  #8  
nightrunner's Avatar
Mr. Obvious
iTrader: (4)
 
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,006
Likes: 2
From: Manchester, TN
Default

Reply
Old Nov 16, 2006 | 07:49 PM
  #9  
v8
17,16,15,14,13,12,11 Drvr
iTrader: (10)
 
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 6,713
Likes: 0
From: Mont Belvieu, Texas
Default

haahhhhahahaahhahaha
Reply
Old Nov 17, 2006 | 01:39 AM
  #10  
Wheatley's Avatar
Truck Sponsor
iTrader: (12)
 
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,286
Likes: 2
From: Sealy/Katy TX
Default

Seen that one but still funny.LOL
Reply
Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
carid
Sponsor's Announcements, Sales, and Specials
0
Oct 1, 2015 09:22 AM
Benloe
Drag Racing
8
Sep 22, 2015 10:24 PM
Justin87gn
FORCED INDUCTION
9
Sep 10, 2015 12:06 PM




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:50 PM.