Stupid bird feeder
Apr 18, 2008 | 07:43 AM
#1
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 27,563
Likes: 3
From: Maryland
Stupid bird feeder
Originally Posted by from stupid mass emails
I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with
seed. What a beauty of a bird feeder it is as I filled it lovingly
with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage
of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food.
But then the birds started building nests in the boards of
the patio, above the table, and next to the barbecue.
Then came the poop. It was everywhere: on the patio tile,
the chairs, the table . . . everywhere!
Then some of the birds turned mean. They would dive bomb me and try to
peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket.
And others birds were boisterous and loud. They sat on the feeder and
squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that
I fill it when it got low on food.
After a while, I couldn't even sit on my own back porch anymore. So I
took down the bird feeder and in three days the birds were gone. I
cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio.
Soon, the back yard was like it used to be . . . quiet, serene and no
one demanding their rights to a free meal.
Now let's see . . our government gives out free food,
subsidized housing, free medical care, and free education and allows
anyone born here to be an automatic citizen.
Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands.
Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services; small apartments are
housing 5 families; you have to wait six hours to be seen by an emergency
room doctor; your child's 2nd grade class is behind other schools
because over half the class doesn't speak English.
Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box; I have to 'press one' to hear my
bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than 'Old
Glory' are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties.
Just my opinion, but maybe it's time for the government to take down the
bird feeder.
seed. What a beauty of a bird feeder it is as I filled it lovingly
with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage
of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food.
But then the birds started building nests in the boards of
the patio, above the table, and next to the barbecue.
Then came the poop. It was everywhere: on the patio tile,
the chairs, the table . . . everywhere!
Then some of the birds turned mean. They would dive bomb me and try to
peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket.
And others birds were boisterous and loud. They sat on the feeder and
squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that
I fill it when it got low on food.
After a while, I couldn't even sit on my own back porch anymore. So I
took down the bird feeder and in three days the birds were gone. I
cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio.
Soon, the back yard was like it used to be . . . quiet, serene and no
one demanding their rights to a free meal.
Now let's see . . our government gives out free food,
subsidized housing, free medical care, and free education and allows
anyone born here to be an automatic citizen.
Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands.
Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services; small apartments are
housing 5 families; you have to wait six hours to be seen by an emergency
room doctor; your child's 2nd grade class is behind other schools
because over half the class doesn't speak English.
Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box; I have to 'press one' to hear my
bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than 'Old
Glory' are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties.
Just my opinion, but maybe it's time for the government to take down the
bird feeder.
I love comparisons, analogies, metaphors. They are like statistics, you can sway them to your argument. LOL **** hits home doesn't it? I don't think we should remove the bird feeder, but it should certainly have a smaller feed hole, an electric fence around it, and a requirement that labor is needed to receive anything from it. You know put like a HUGE revoling door in front of the food that is geared down and hard to push. And then hook it up to a generator so they are accidentally supplying electricity to the building that houses their handouts. (I never read these stupid emails, but this one was sent to me like 4 times in 2 days, I figured someone wanted me to read it LOL)
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