Another funny. "Laws"
Feb 20, 2006 | 07:34 PM
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From: Behind the TIG welder
Another funny. "Laws"
Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch.
Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Bath Theorem:
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Theatre Rule:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets:
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
Law of Location:
No matter where you go, there you are.
Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible, if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch.
Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Bath Theorem:
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Theatre Rule:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets:
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
Law of Location:
No matter where you go, there you are.
Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible, if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
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Feb 23, 2006 | 04:39 PM
#8
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From: Houston, Tx
reminds me of a paradox I heard once...
You know how if you drop buttered toast it will always land on the floor butter side down. Also, it is common knowledge that cats always land on their feet. So logically if you affix (humanely, please) a piece of buttered toast to a cat's back, butter side up, and then drop the cat (again, from a humane height) the cat/toast will levitate above the ground in a continuous spinning motion.
I'm pretty sure I learned that in physics.
You know how if you drop buttered toast it will always land on the floor butter side down. Also, it is common knowledge that cats always land on their feet. So logically if you affix (humanely, please) a piece of buttered toast to a cat's back, butter side up, and then drop the cat (again, from a humane height) the cat/toast will levitate above the ground in a continuous spinning motion.
I'm pretty sure I learned that in physics.
Feb 23, 2006 | 10:31 PM
#9
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Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 470
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From: Virginia
Originally Posted by NBred94
reminds me of a paradox I heard once...
You know how if you drop buttered toast it will always land on the floor butter side down. Also, it is common knowledge that cats always land on their feet. So logically if you affix (humanely, please) a piece of buttered toast to a cat's back, butter side up, and then drop the cat (again, from a humane height) the cat/toast will levitate above the ground in a continuous spinning motion.
I'm pretty sure I learned that in physics.
You know how if you drop buttered toast it will always land on the floor butter side down. Also, it is common knowledge that cats always land on their feet. So logically if you affix (humanely, please) a piece of buttered toast to a cat's back, butter side up, and then drop the cat (again, from a humane height) the cat/toast will levitate above the ground in a continuous spinning motion.
I'm pretty sure I learned that in physics.
Feb 24, 2006 | 07:21 AM
#10
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,396
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From: Galesburg Il
Originally Posted by NBred94
reminds me of a paradox I heard once...
You know how if you drop buttered toast it will always land on the floor butter side down. Also, it is common knowledge that cats always land on their feet. So logically if you affix (humanely, please) a piece of buttered toast to a cat's back, butter side up, and then drop the cat (again, from a humane height) the cat/toast will levitate above the ground in a continuous spinning motion.
I'm pretty sure I learned that in physics.
You know how if you drop buttered toast it will always land on the floor butter side down. Also, it is common knowledge that cats always land on their feet. So logically if you affix (humanely, please) a piece of buttered toast to a cat's back, butter side up, and then drop the cat (again, from a humane height) the cat/toast will levitate above the ground in a continuous spinning motion.
I'm pretty sure I learned that in physics.
Thats true.. but if you use TWO pieces of buttered toast the cat lands on it's head.
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